Skip to main content

The Importance of Actively Participating Father's



Hey everyone!  This week we are talking about the important roles that father’s play in the home.  There are so many statistics that back up the importance of an actively participating father in the home.  Father’s do much more than provide financial support to the family.  Below is an image I borrowed from fatherhood.org explaining the statistics of fatherless homes:





If these statistics don’t impress on you enough the importance of father’s in your home, then I don’t know what will.

According to The Huffington Post, they say that, “Girls will look for men who hold the patterns of good old dad, for after all, they know how "to do that." Therefore, if father was kind, loving, and gentle, they will reach for those characteristics in men. Girls will look for, in others, what they have experienced and become familiar with in childhood.” 

They also explain that, “Boys on the other hand, will model themselves after their fathers. They will look for their father's approval in everything they do, and copy those behaviors that they recognize as both successful and familiar. Thus, if dad was abusive, controlling, and dominating, those will be the patterns that their sons will imitate and emulate. However, if father is loving, kind, supportive, and protective, boys will want to be that.”

Father’s presence (and type of) in the home determines much of how the children will turn out.  Girls will seek the kind of man that their father was (good or bad) and boys will seek to emulate the kind of father they had (good or bad) which is always unintentional but there is so much research to support that.

Financial issues can be a tough part of every marriage.  A lot of families these days have both spouses/parents working to help support the family.  We talked about a case in class where both the husband and the wife went to work. The husband worked 40+ hours a week and the woman worked 32+ hours a week.  With the wife going back to work, there were extra transportation costs, childcare costs, food costs, new clothing costs, recreation for the kids costs, and so much more.   This couple hired an accountant to see how much they were actually making with the wife going back to work with the added expenditures:

   $42,000/year (husband’s salary)
+ $22,000/ year (wife’s salary)
   $40,500/ year (combined salary)

When I learned this, I was shocked.  Even with the wife working an almost full-time job, with all of the extra expenses, they were making LESS than they were before she went back to work.  It may be a good activity to sit down with your spouse and map out your expenses to see if it is beneficial for your family to be working or if it would benefit your family more to stay home with the children.

Marvin J. Ashton gives a wonderful talk entitled, “One for the Money”:


I love this talk because he gives 12 tips to help families improve financial management.  They are as follows:

1.       Teach family members early the importance of working and earning.
2.       Teach children to make money decisions in keeping with their capacities to comprehend.
3.       Teach each family member to contribute to the total family welfare.
4.       Teach family members that paying financial obligations promptly is part of integrity and honesty development.
5.       Learn to manage money before it manages you.
6.       Learn self-discipline and self-restraint in money matters.
7.       Use a budget.
8.       Make education a continuing process.
9.       Work toward home ownership.
10.   Appropriately involve yourself in an insurance program.
11.   Strive to understand and cope with existing inflation.
12.   Appropriately involve yourself in a food storage program.

These tips can help enrich our financial lives in our families if we implement them. 

Father’s do so much for the family, and I am so grateful for a father who has been the most incredible example to me and one who has helped shape me into the person I am.  He has sacrificed so much for my family and I and he has been there every step of the way.  My dad means the world to me.  Because of the man that my dad is, he has helped me set my standards high for those I date.  I look forward to the day when I will have a husband who helps support and raise children to be the best that they can be, just like my dad did. 



Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Preparing for Marriage

I am sooo excited about the topic this week!   The topic is, (drum roll please), Preparing for marriage!!!! This information really rang true to me because this is the stage that I am currently in.   Let’s get right to it. Dating is an important aspect of eventually finding someone that you will share your life with.   Assortive Dating is the idea that you date multiple people, no strings attached, just going out and having a good time and meeting new people.   This is an important stage that many people skip.   My mom likes to call it shopping for ice cream flavors.   Everyone is different and you may think you like mint chocolate chip until you try graham canyon.   This gives you an idea of what you need in a relationship and things that you could do without. In a devotional given by Dallin H. Oaks entitled “Dating vs. Hanging Out” he explains the 3 p’s of dating: “A “date” must pass the test of three p’s:   Date must h...

Relationships with In-Laws

This week we are talking about the in-laws!!!  This is a topic that many people make jokes about and that many people struggle with.  So how do we create healthy relationships with our in-laws?  What boundaries should we set and how do we do that respectfully?  We are going to explore the answers to these in this post. When we get married, we have just covenanted to love and cleave unto our spouse and no one else.   In Genesis 2:24 it says, “Therefore shall a man leave his father and mother and shall cleave unto his wife.” The dictionary defines cleave as “to remain attached, devoted, or faithful to,” and “to remain steadfast”.   This is what is required of us when we marry someone. In “Creating Healthy Ties with In-Laws and Extended Family” by James M. Harper and Susanne Frost Olsen, they say that, “a newly married couple is to separate from the families in which they grew up. One component of separating from families of origin involves creating ...

Staying Emotionally Connected

Welcome back to another post!   This week we are talking about the importance of staying emotionally connected with your spouse.   It is easy to let the little things get in the way of connecting with our spouse.   Whether that be an irritation we have with them, our cell phones, work, exhaustion, frustration, or to-do lists (this one is my blockade to connection).   Often, we see these things as the most important rather than our eternal companion who is literally the most important thing in the world (after God of course).   I have loved reading about this this week, and I can’t wait to dive in.   Here we go! In The Seven Principles for Making marriage Work by John M. Gottman, he shares the importance of turning towards each other.   He explains that when we turn toward our partner, mutual trust is built.   He also says that true romance, “is kept alive each time you let your spouse know he or she is valued during the grind of every da...