Skip to main content

Fidelity and Physical Intimacy


Fidelity and physical intimacy.  There is so much taboo around this topic.  It is very healthy to read from appropriate sources about sexual intimacy and to talk about it as well.  It is a gift from God and one that we don’t understand enough about. I am going to rely heavily on sources in this post as I want to share correct knowledge with you about this subject.

In the article, “They Twain Shall Be One” by Brent A. Barlow, he says, “Some people still believe that sexual intimacy is a necessary evil by which we have children. These people get an inaccurate view from parents who were too embarrassed to discuss such matters with their children or who were so concerned that their children live the law of chastity that they taught only the negative consequences of the improper use of intimacy.” (1986).  This can have such a poor effect on people when they hold this belief.  When they get to marriage, the thing that is ordained of God, seems to be a sin to people.  This is heartbreaking to me. 

Barlow continues, “President Kimball has observed: “The Bible celebrates sex and its proper use, presenting it as God-created, God-ordained, God-blessed. It makes plain that God himself implanted the physical magnetism between the sexes for two reasons: for the propagation of the human race, and for the expression of that kind of love between man and wife that makes for true oneness. His commandment to the first man and woman to be ‘one flesh’ was as important as his command to ‘be fruitful and multiply.’” (Quoting Billy Graham, Ensign, May 1974, p. 7.)” (1986).  Sexual intimacy is a beautiful expression of love and it is a means of bringing God’s children into this world, which is the greatest gift we could ever offer.  God created us the way we are so we can participate in this wonderful gift from Him.

Barlow finishes, “But we also believe in the good that can be derived from the appropriate use of intimacy in marriage. We are well aware of the joy and unity that can come to a married couple when this particular dimension of the marital relationship is nurtured.” (1986).  There can be so much joy and peace found when the act of sexual intimacy is done with respect, care, and love, and can bond two people more than anything else in this world. 

How do we remain faithful?  And what are the warning signs?  In the article “Fidelity in Marriage—it’s More Than You Think” by Kenneth W. Mattheson he shares that, “Fidelity includes refraining from physical contact—but that is not all. Fidelity also means complete commitment, trust, and respect between husband and wife. Inappropriate interactions with another person can erode fidelity…. Emotional infidelity, which occurs when emotions and thoughts are focused on someone other than a spouse, is an insidious threat that can weaken the trust between a couple and shatter peace of mind.” (2009).

I know as we come to learn more about sexual intimacy from the proper sources we will be blessed and understand that this is a beautiful part of God’s plan.  Nothing could be greater than the bonding we can feel with our spouse.

References:

Barlow, B. A. (n.d.). They Twain Shall Be One. Retrieved from https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/ensign/1986/09/they-twain-shall-be-one-thoughts-on-intimacy-in-marriage?lang=eng.

Matheson Professor, K. W., School of Social Work, & Brigham Young University. (n.d.). Fidelity in Marriage. Retrieved from https://www.churchofjesuschrist.org/study/ensign/2009/09/fidelity-in-marriage-its-more-than-you-think?lang=eng.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Preparing for Marriage

I am sooo excited about the topic this week!   The topic is, (drum roll please), Preparing for marriage!!!! This information really rang true to me because this is the stage that I am currently in.   Let’s get right to it. Dating is an important aspect of eventually finding someone that you will share your life with.   Assortive Dating is the idea that you date multiple people, no strings attached, just going out and having a good time and meeting new people.   This is an important stage that many people skip.   My mom likes to call it shopping for ice cream flavors.   Everyone is different and you may think you like mint chocolate chip until you try graham canyon.   This gives you an idea of what you need in a relationship and things that you could do without. In a devotional given by Dallin H. Oaks entitled “Dating vs. Hanging Out” he explains the 3 p’s of dating: “A “date” must pass the test of three p’s:   Date must h...
Post a Comment
Read more

Relationships with In-Laws

This week we are talking about the in-laws!!!  This is a topic that many people make jokes about and that many people struggle with.  So how do we create healthy relationships with our in-laws?  What boundaries should we set and how do we do that respectfully?  We are going to explore the answers to these in this post. When we get married, we have just covenanted to love and cleave unto our spouse and no one else.   In Genesis 2:24 it says, “Therefore shall a man leave his father and mother and shall cleave unto his wife.” The dictionary defines cleave as “to remain attached, devoted, or faithful to,” and “to remain steadfast”.   This is what is required of us when we marry someone. In “Creating Healthy Ties with In-Laws and Extended Family” by James M. Harper and Susanne Frost Olsen, they say that, “a newly married couple is to separate from the families in which they grew up. One component of separating from families of origin involves creating ...
Post a Comment
Read more

Staying Emotionally Connected

Welcome back to another post!   This week we are talking about the importance of staying emotionally connected with your spouse.   It is easy to let the little things get in the way of connecting with our spouse.   Whether that be an irritation we have with them, our cell phones, work, exhaustion, frustration, or to-do lists (this one is my blockade to connection).   Often, we see these things as the most important rather than our eternal companion who is literally the most important thing in the world (after God of course).   I have loved reading about this this week, and I can’t wait to dive in.   Here we go! In The Seven Principles for Making marriage Work by John M. Gottman, he shares the importance of turning towards each other.   He explains that when we turn toward our partner, mutual trust is built.   He also says that true romance, “is kept alive each time you let your spouse know he or she is valued during the grind of every da...
Post a Comment
Read more