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FAMILY 100-- Sanctification and Cooperation


There are so many factors that determine the success of a relationship.  One of those is the view/perspective we have on our relationship.  It is important to recognize this because our view will directly affect how we treat our marriages or other relationships, "A “sanctified” relationship ought to be a happy relationship as people go to great lengths to protect and preserve that which they perceive to be sacred (Pargament & Mahoney, 2005)." (Hawkins, 2012, p. 196)

Hawkins quotes, “President Thomas S. Monson describes the counsel he received from his sealer at the marriage altar on his wedding day: Successful marriages . . . are established and maintained on principles of . . . prayer. May I offer you newlyweds a formula which will ensure that any disagreement you may have will last no longer than one day? Every night kneel by the side of your bed. One night, Brother Monson, you offer the prayer, aloud, on bended knee. The next night you, Sister Monson, offer the prayer, aloud, on bended knee. I can then assure you that any misunderstanding that develops during the day will vanish as you pray. You simply can’t pray together and retain any but the best of feelings toward one another (Monson, 2001, p. 4)." (2012, p. 196).  I love this quote because it offers us tangible advice on what we can do to maintain the sanctity and holiness of our marital relationships.

Image result for praying by the bed couple

Hawkins continues, “Drawing on the powers of heaven through prayer is a powerful resource available to couples that can make a good relationship better" (2012, p. 196).  I truly believe that calling on the God’s power through prayer, made possible by the enabling power of the atonement of Jesus Christ, we can make our relationships better simply by involving a power that is greater than us.
Martial conflict is inevitable and can be damaging if we do not handle it correctly or at all.  Hawkins shares, "couples reported that including God in their marriage through prayer appeared to be a “softening” event that facilitated problem-solving and reconciliation." (2012, p. 198).  When we pray together, we are more likely able to problem-solve and find reconciliation more readily and efficiently.  Otherwise, when we rely on our own power, our ability is rather limited. “During times of conflict, when emergent goals typically prevail, prayer can restore harmony and promote a greater desire to work together. Prayer can aid us in both strengthening and mending our eternally important relationships." (Hawkins, 2012, p. 199)

In conclusion, I firmly believe that when we view our relationships as sacred and eternal, our effort to maintain that will increase.  Relationships are bound to have bumps along the road but if we actively involve prayer and seek for God’s power in our lives, we will be able to make our bad relationships good and our good relationships better.

References:
Hawkins, A. J., Dollahite, D. C., & Draper, T. (2012). Successful marriages and families: proclamation principles and research perspectives. Provo, UT: BYU Studies and School of Family Life, Brigham Young University.

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